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| #591 |  | If it were thought that anything I wrote was influenced by Robert Frost, I would take that particular work of mine, shred it, and flush it down the toilet, hoping not to clog the pipes. A more sententious, holding- forth old bore who expected every hero-worshiping adenoidal little twerp of a student-poet to hang on to his every word I never saw. -- James Dickey
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| #592 |  | If life is a stage, I want some better lighting.
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| #593 |  | If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words. -- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life"
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| #594 |  | If you have to ask what jazz is, you'll never know. -- Louis Armstrong
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| #595 |  | If you lose a son you can always get another, but there's only one Maltese Falcon. -- Sidney Greenstreet, "The Maltese Falcon"
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| #596 |  | If you think the pen is mightier than the sword, the next time someone pulls out a sword I'd like to see you get up there with your Bic.
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| #597 |  | If you want to get rich from writing, write the sort of thing that's read by persons who move their lips when the're reading to themselves. -- Don Marquis
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| #598 |  | Imitation is the sincerest form of television. -- Fred Allen
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| #599 |  | Immature artists imitate, mature artists steal. -- Lionel Trilling
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| #600 |  | Immature poets imitate, mature poets steal. -- T.S. Eliot, "Philip Massinger"
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