|
#2111 | | Real computer scientists don't write code. They occasionally tinker with `programming systems', but those are so high level that they hardly count (and rarely count accurately; precision is for applications).
|
|
#2112 | | Real computer scientists like having a computer on their desk, else how could they read their mail?
|
|
#2113 | | Real computer scientists only write specs for languages that might run on future hardware. Nobody trusts them to write specs for anything homo sapiens will ever be able to fit on a single planet.
|
|
#2114 | | Real programmers disdain structured programming. Structured programming is for compulsive neurotics who were prematurely toilet- trained. They wear neckties and carefully line up pencils on otherwise clear desks.
|
|
#2115 | | Real programmers don't bring brown-bag lunches. If the vending machine doesn't sell it, they don't eat it. Vending machines don't sell quiche.
|
|
#2116 | | Real programmers don't comment their code. It was hard to write, it should be hard to understand.
|
|
#2117 | | Real programmers don't draw flowcharts. Flowcharts are, after all, the illiterate's form of documentation. Cavemen drew flowcharts; look how much good it did them.
|
|
#2118 | | Real Programmers don't eat quiche. They eat Twinkies and Szechwan food.
|
|
#2119 | | Real Programmers don't play tennis, or any other sport that requires you to change clothes. Mountain climbing is OK, and real programmers wear their climbing boots to work in case a mountain should suddenly spring up in the middle of the machine room.
|
|
#2120 | | Real programmers don't write in BASIC. Actually, no programmers write in BASIC after reaching puberty.
|
|
|
... ... |